August 6, 2012
“I mean to lead a simple life, to choose a simple shell I can carry easily-like a hermit crab.” –Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Gift from the Sea
In April, I took a guess at what I would miss from home, from my very complicated shell, aside from friends and family. Let’s see how my prediction skills played out.
–Our home: I specifically thought I’d miss the space and things like our hot tub, and my vegetable garden. I so miss our home, but not the things. I miss the gentle, soft, cozy feeling we have created, like a safe harbor in a storm. Hmm… But Patronus feels very much like home to me already. On the coast, organic farm stands are always within walking distance, so we have plenty of lovely vegetables. I do miss tending to my garden, picking food I grew myself, and having a direct connection with the earth as I thank it for providing food for our family. I would miss our hot tub if I didn’t have an entire ocean right outside my front door in which to play, swim, and relax! Plus, I have salt water, which is so much better for the soul.
Patronus in her neighborhood du jour
–Our neighborhood: Our new neighborhood is the sea, and it turns out it is filled with boats. We meet people every day and end up chatting with them, hanging out on each other’s boats, and exchanging emails. Then we will see them again a week later, in a harbor 80 miles away or more! The sailing community is tight-knit and makes for instant comraderie. Folks wave to each other as they pass on the water. Conversations strike up over boats, harbors, and sailing with children. And help is always a short dinghy ride away.
– Massages, acupuncture, manicures and pedicures, eyebrow waxing, facials, and getting my hair done: I was right on the money with this one. The physical labor of sailing has me wishing for a massage on a daily basis. And anyone who knows me can figure out that I miss my acupuncture more than words can say. I bring my awareness to my body’s energy on a daily basis to stay in-tune with what my body needs (unfortunately, what it really needs is to be stuck with needles:). In the meantime, I focus on moving energy through my body so that it flows freely and happily. An acupuncture appointment is on the books during our 5 day trip back to New Jersey at the end of August. I am also counting the minutes till I get my hair dyed that weekend. Salt, sun, and gray-hair genes are wreaking havoc on my locks. I am doing a fair job at doing my own nails when I get the chance, but that hasn’t been often.
“lifting weights” in Jewell Island
–Sports: funny. I don’t think I’ve stopped moving since July 1st. While I haven’t done my typical combination of tennis, cycling, and yoga, I have been swimming daily, hiking every day, and paddling on our SUP (stand up paddleboard). If I wasn’t eating so much, I would be in crazy amazing shape, but at least I’m keeping a good balance. I miss my bike, though, and have tried several times to rent a bicycle for the day. Weather and other distractions keep thwarting my plans. I will be trying again this week at Acadia National Park (spoiler alert: I did ride a bike, but it was with 3 children in tow. I don’t need to
Reese almost in a headstand. First try.
tell you that it wasn’t. quite. the. same.). I don’t miss tennis because (1) I am really terrible at it and (2) I don’t usually play in the summer anyway because it’s too hot. But yoga. Oh yoga. I miss my intense classes at Yoga Synthesis in Ramsey and my amazing teacher Raji. I am practicing yoga on my paddle board, which is really cool. I also took a class in Wellfleet and will be taking classes anywhere I can find them along the way.
–Driving: not one bit. We got a ride recently from our friends to go exploring and I saw a McDonald’s for the first time since we left New Jersey. I wanted to scream, “Turn the car around!” I could live on the edge of the sea forever and be happy. I get how civilization is a wonderful thing for many people, but like being “out of it”. (caveat: I am FINALLY posting this blog from a marina that actually has WiFi. If you had seen the dance of joy I did when my computer connected, you would have called me a total fraud with my “oh, I can do without civilization” bit.)
–The fireplace. Snow. Fall leaves. Crisp fall days. Crocuses poking their devil-may-care heads up through the snow way too early for flowers that should know better: the point behind this was that I was going to miss the fall and winter seasons, especially being cold. Being in the Northeast for the summer, the Chesapeake for the fall, and the Caribbean for the winter means that we will be in hot weather the whole year. But then there was Maine. Oh, how sweet it has been to be thinking, “I could really use a long-sleeved shirt,” during the day and “Where are my wool socks!!??” at night.
Reese has some alone time up top but checks in on me..
–Personal space: Not an issue at all. Patronus, our 47 foot Beneteau 473, is big. Our three cabins (bedrooms) give plenty of room for kids to sulk when they are moody and a chance for me to escape if I need a few minutes to myself. But those times have been few and far between. We mostly spend time up in the cockpit, and the kids love to hang out by themselves or all together on the foredeck. If I am doing dishes in the galley, it usually feels like I am the only one on the boat! We have been busy exploring the ports, islands, and other places along the way, so there are many days when we aren’t on the boat all day long. And when we are in a secluded cove with nowhere to go, we take turns kayaking, swimming, and paddle boarding, which also gives us some variation in the family mix. So far, so good, but it’s only been as long as a super-long vacation so far…
-Toilets: Chris is having more of an issue with the heads on the boat than I am. The electric one isn’t a hassle at all. It is easy to use and not that loud. The holding tanks take quite a while to fill up. But Chris is the one who has to empty them at the pumpout stations, so it makes sense that he is still trying to get everyone to use on-shore facilities as much as possible!
sunglasses and my au natural hairdo
–My blow dryer. “I’m really going to miss my not-completely-flat-hair.” was my original lament. I do miss my blow dryer (actually, I snuck it on the boat and have been able to use it a few times when showering on-shore. Shh! Don’t tell Chris). But I am finding that my sun-dried hair has a bit of a tussled, carefree wave to it. I look like someone who lives on a sailboat and hangs out in nature all day. I’m cool with that.
-Makeup: I have found a very simple solution to not wearing makeup: Sunglasses. Done.
-Showers: Since we ended up with a stall shower in one of the heads, this has not been as much of an issue as I had feared. Our water tanks are lasting longer than I had estimated, and we still have ready access to filling them up at marinas. The only problem with showers on board is that we don’t have hot water unless we just ran the engine or generator. We only run the engine under way. And when we get someplace and turn off the engine, we usually get off the boat and go explore. By the time we return and are ready for showers, the water is cold again. Also, showers mean towels (see below).
-Ice Cream: LOL!!! I have had more ice cream since we left than I ate at home, and that was nothing to sneeze at. But this fear still stands, since I believe the ice cream availability will dwindle as we move towards the Caribbean :(
–Listening to my children playing piano: Yes. I miss hearing the piano and we haven’t yet hooked up our portable keyboard to the computer so that they can play. However, we beefed up our iPod playlists before we left and we just got Sirius, so we are listening to more music together as a family than we did at home. Singing and dancing up on deck is a daily activity, so music is still very much in our lives. I love impressing the kids by turning on the ‘80’s station and singing every word to every song.
–Holiday Decorations: It’s not time to miss these yet, but I have to say that not having any decorations in the boat has not been a problem. Everything is simple, clean, and practical. I feel like Anne Morrow Lindbergh in my favorite book, Gift From The Sea. “One learns first of all in beach living the art of shedding; how little one can get along with, not how much…One finds one is shedding not only clothes-but vanity.” I have two picture frames and a bowl of seashells in my room, which is my one area of prettiness for its own sake. Also, in the past, we have enjoyed picking out a tree decoration whenever we went on vacation. We have refrained from this tradition so far, because we would need about six trees to put up all the decorations by the time the year is over (in the first 40 days we have been to 21 destinations). We also don’t have any place to store them.
Here are some things I have really missed or needed that we don’t have:
blueberry muff…er…cake
A muffin pan (to make blueberry muffins with fresh Maine blueberries): I thought about asking one of our “neighbors” to borrow one, but I used our cake pan instead and made blueberry cake with whole wheat flour.
Wrapping paper: I wrapped Chris’ birthday gifts in pajamas!
My King sized bed: Oh, how a bigger bed would mean the world to me. I can’t get used to our queen bed (which is narrower at the head than at the foot). I like my space and need to feel cool when sleeping. I will really be getting cranky about it when the heat dials up in the Caribbean.
Instant Access: At home, when I need something, all I have to do is open a cabinet door to get it. I am slowly getting used to moving three cushions and pulling everything out of a storage space to get the thing that is most definitely on the bottom.
My washing machine and dryer. I can’t believe I didn’t have this on that list in April. I would say that this is the item I miss the most. Chris gets excited when we read about a port that is isolated and deserted. I get excited when I see the little “Washing Machine” symbol in the guidebook, which means that there are laundry facilities in town. On the bright side, I LOVE LAUNDROMATS! Have you been to one lately? Holy cow! The commercial machines cost $9.00 per load, but you can stuff 60 pounds of laundry into them! Here’s what fit in two loads yesterday: 3 queen sheet sets; 3 queen thermal blankets; 10 towels; 2 regular sized loads of clothing. Completely amazing. Plus, I love to put quarters in the machines and fold my clothes on their nice big folding tables….
Dry Measuring Cups and Mixing Bowls: I didn’t think we would be doing much baking, so I settled for bringing a few medium-sized bowls and our liquid measuring cup. We have been surprised at how many times we reach for one of these items and realize we don’t have them. We will be bringing them back with us after our trip home in August.
Porter aka my human wifi extender
Internet Access: I’ve already complained about this, so I won’t bore you again, but I could seriously go on all day long about this. I miss access to information and the ability to send and receive emails and texts. I wish I could update our website whenever I have a post ready, or at least put up a status update on our Facebook Fanpage (conwaysailors). But maybe I am disappointed that I am not having an easier time unplugging. Maybe I underestimated my reliance on connectivity. When we ask other cruisers how they deal with the internet issue, they kind of shrug and don’t seem to care much at all. They get free WiFi when they can, and when they can’t, they just read a book or have a cocktail. No biggie. Maybe I’ll get there…
towels, perpetually drying on the rails…
Dryness: everything is pretty much damp, moist, drenched, or sopping wet. All the time. This is going to take some getting used to. The really warm days when everything dries out are a real treat.
What I do know is that the things I miss don’t come close to holding a candle to the things I appreciate about living on a sailboat: sunsets over the water, waking up with the light and the sounds of birds and sailboat rigging, eating outdoors for every meal, watching dolphins and porpoises play next to us, the wind caressing me, sailing into a new harbor, wondering what delights it will hold, and being with my family- getting to understand and appreciate my children so much more each day.
Our mooring secured, we were ready to meet up with the Edelsons, a family from Ho-Ho-Kus who were on their way up from New Jersey to visit their parents. When they got to the harbor, they walked down to the end of one of the docks and simply had to yell to us to come over in the dinghy (it’s a very small harbor). Good thing, because we have officially entered the technology-free world: no cell service, no 4G, no email, no internet, no WiFi, no nothin’. We threw connectivity to the wind and enjoyed dinner at the Lobster Dock restaurant.
Back at the boat, we found the kids playing, kayaking, and paddle boarding all over the harbor. They never stopped all day and had a great time exploring the beaches and bridges throughout Boothbay. That night, Reese went back to the Edelson’s home for a sleepover.
Vance guided us through the tricky harbor entrance like a pro. The guidebooks had warned not to attempt this harbor without local knowledge, but here we were, with Local Knowledge himself! More kayaking and paddling ensued, followed by another great dinner out, ice cream (in the Middle of Nowhere at a place that defies all economic planning, the tenets of supply and demand, and the old adage of Location, Location, Location). They apparently get by with their friendliness and their great ice cream. But what more do you need, really?
